A Million Little Things

Today was a day of reflection. I have thought and gone over in my head everything that all the doctors have told me. I constantly ask myself "Am I making this up?" I’m definitively not. "Why can't they find anything wrong?" They did. "Was this a waste of time?" No.

I go back to what the surgeon said when I first arrived. She said the human body can choose to have a million little things going on with it or it can have one big thing. It’s their job to figure it out. My chief complaints when I first arrived were migraines, the inability to wake up, and my thyroid. We have ruled out some major things going on with me. For now, my thyroid and all the nodes stay. We will revisit them in a year. Exceptions to that are if my voice drops any lower, or if the big one impedes on my swallowing. The doctors are discouraging any surgery until we can get my central nervous system back in line. So, I made a list of what needs to be done. First things first, I have to get my new migraine drugs. Next, I need to make an appointment for a sleep study. I have a follow up appointment scheduled with my neurologist just before Christmas.

I need to consider what my daily routine is going to look like when we get home. My gut instinct is to try to jump back into my normal routine. FORCE my body to ”act normal”. Somehow, my doctor instinctively knew this about me. She told me that will only cause further trauma to my central nervous system. My body is in a constant state of fight or flight and until they can figure out how to treat my sleep deprivation, I have to rest. A million little things. Sarah’s going to be working closer to home. It will help us a lot now that she's no longer on call.

Right now, I want to focus on talking to the kids and then I plan to sleep. Meanwhile, enjoy this picture the pet sitter sent us of our guinea pigs having a meeting. Bear is obviously chairing the meeting tonight.